Wednesday, November 29, 2006

A long overdue post on the havoc on Daniel's birthday for CE :D

On that day itself, our unit was in charge of the decor so we bought the materials in the morning, by walking through carrefour, spotlight and Daiso, spending a few hours looking for all the totally RANDOM STUFF that we could find to decorate America room. It was quite hilarious with the sparkly streams which people use for christmas coz we found them in all colours and shades, even pink and purple! x.x Haha personally, i thot it would fit sf no.1 v well :D :P

After service, it was pure havoc! :P Everyone was writing/cutting/designing/slacking and doing random stuff to the materials in whatever way we could to make the room look nice and when we got into the room, everything went at top speed lol! There was a lot of noise and shouting for scotchtape, where to hang banners, where to paste this and that! The best part was everyone was so gan chiong coz every that could go missing went missing. Some of the alphabets for the happy birthday balloons popped which lead a lot of distress and squealing(from uhhh...) and Cut cake quite designing new alphabet balloons :P We even forgot to paste the carefully cut out letters for "Daniel" at the LAST minute, which lead to Sotong screaming/wailing(?) in her high pitch sop voice, which made Tracy all the more ganchiong! It was just really funny coz we ended up laughing at ourselves :P The balloons kept needed YS to put them back and again. But in the end everything was GREAT! YAY!!! Thank GOD! :D
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

MCG was yesterday at East Coast and this must be the HIGHLIGHT of my hols atm :). Despite the early shower in the morning, we went there and God blessed us with SUNNY WEATHER :D The afternoon was beautiful and we played games that the 4 organisers painstakingly planned :P Kudos to Tracy, Leon, XT and Fungg :)

Complicated catching was... errr complicated. It involved a food chain kind of catching with planning and strategies to take off as many lives as possible from the opposing team. I was errr just stoning arnd letting pple catch me and watched mixed reactions :P Until i started running... which was a mistake coz i ended up running from one boundary to the other and back again x.x Coz they kept chasing me to the sea larh!!

The second game was dodgeball kind of game with waterbombs. It was something like paintball style where you have to dig up sweets instead of capture the flag. And if you get hit by a waterbomb you had to get back to base. This was quite fun actually :P coz we got wet(a little) and it was fun running up and down, dodging bombs and frantically digging up sweets x.x :P

Lastly, we had a tug-of-war which was hilarious although it went wrong :P But we had a good laugh! It was made out of raffia and before we even put in strength to pull it broke! :D And I remember the back of my group were still running with the string LOL! :P But it was reallie fun and enjoyable thanks to this caregroup that God blessed me with :D

Immediately after that, the dunking started :P I dragged Sam into the water first, then Jx followed shortly after, and v soon all the guys ended up dripping wet :P or more or less all :P Even poor Leonzy got dragged in :P. We all ended up splashing in the sea for quite some time before we went up to shore.

After that, Sam and some others went biking while me, Robert and Yan Shao dropped by this rock by the beach overlooking the sea. It was beautiful with the sun edging ever slowly towards the other horizon, as i played on the guitar. It was just peaceful and it truly reminded me of God's greatness. He created all these! The vast oceans, the sun, the sky, everyone a beauty and creation of our everloving father!! We're one of his creations as well, beautiful in His eye :) and i almost felt that He created that moment, that place and that time just for me to shut out everything and focus on this peace. It was almost like He wanted to show me something and i could feel Him so tangibly :)

The BBQ at night was really yummy and fun, coz we were all cooking and making a lot of noise in the process, flipping chicken wings, patties, Otah and all the other food articles which were brought along. It was great, seeing more people come to join us like Eugene, HY and Yongsheng:P The Patties are still the best :P We talked and sang and played, in the blink of an eye it was 1030 O.O!

Haha after going to the wrong bus stop, i just took another bus back to PS with the rest and i finally reached home at 12 plus x.x.

This lead to today's training becoming a true test of perseverance with the exhaustion setting in almost immediately and the drowsiness. The epidemic also seemed to have finally reached me...

But its all worth it i guess and God really showed me, how He'll provide for me and told me why He said those things at Encounter half a year ago. I understand now, Lord :) Those words as vividly as yesterday. Living for YOU!

Saturday, November 25, 2006

Wanted to post sth but just deleted it.

Service was great and nostalgic bringing back the songs i first heard in service in april. King of majesty was truly amazing and it made me miss singing it the moment i started.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANIEL!!!!

Really wanna thank him for being a great DL :) and a true inspiration to me. In all his cheerful and friendly comments, questions and demeanor, when you examine his actions, he really really cares for Central and wants for us to grow and stay strong =) I think the way he cares for his people and his advice is truly treasured. Thank you Daniel!!! Esp for all those rides home and advice!!! :D

"I don't know"s bring you nowhere... Do something about it.

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Music... is a beautiful language. It can describe everything in the world... a song stirs uncountable emotions haha sometimes i think it paints much more than a picture :)

I remember the times i used to fall over and beat myself up, every single day, every hour, every second of my life because of all the small trivial and superficial things in life. But when i came to know His love, it changed :) Thank You for all You've done and for changing my life.

Stumbling over so many different things, it hurts and you may complain about it all, but someday we'll get over it. I was tripping, falling and hurting myself, now i still am though lesser because i've seen through it. Someday i'll get to that goal.

I thought it'd be okay. But it seems like everything needs to start from scratch again. I look at the past and sigh, but i'd never regretted taking that path and going through all this. I still would have taken the same path because it meant a lot to me. God, may your will be done. This path i entrust to You, although i wish it would end ok, but i will never know your Plan so lead me down and let me slowly notice it for i trust in You :)

Work harder.

I miss that past but it is no longer here, so i can only look forward...

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Taking on a whole new level. Still on that journey with God with the many distractions and temptations. Been praying hard for what is to come!! :D

Exhausted, however curiously not hungry after the 4-5pm mark. But this is reallie tough and not as easy as it seems. Your senses get a bit weird after a while somehow. My brain's functioning a lil weird too. But still concentrating and feasting on God tho its quite difficult at times, but thank God for providing for me!! :D

Anyway, it isn't that bad and my mind hasn't cleared. Shall post about everything more clearly tmr.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

YAY!!!! i just sort of composed a worship song! Haha i'm so excited somehow and refreshed! Praise God :D

Its going to be a HUGE challenge tomorrow!!

I wanna commit this time to You :) and i reallie hope i'll pull through.

Man does not live on bread alone but also on God's word.

Self-control, Focus.

My heart on One.

Monday, November 20, 2006

To tell u the truth, fanatic is a word which disturbs me, coz a fanatic follows without thinking. But i'm not one. Because i know You are right for me and the basis is the countless times you've blessed me big or small, in ways i knew or never knew. The way You looked and me and whispered in my heart, " I forgive you.", which made me new again with a new purpose. The way You are with me wherever I go and support me in good times or bad.

DcTalk had a song which went like this- " What would people do if i told them that i was a Jesus freak? What would people do if they find out its true?"

My answer is the same as the song's. "I dont really care if they label me a Jesus freak
There aint no disguising the truth."

Thanks Kat & JH for reminding me of who i am and reminding me that isn't this what being a child of God is about :)

Today, we did karate at training and it was rather fun to tell the truth altho my right arm couldn't exert any force wadsoever x.x. The shoulder is still swollen and the elbow left unhealed. I realised that food is a temptation that fakes your mind and body. Blahh... becoz i ate some fries which were like oily when i was like quite full, i just had a whim and threw away the rest after a few bits and went to run twice up and down my 12 storey flat. 12 storeys may not seem much but when you do it once or twice your thighs get cramps x.x. Its not a bad workout considering 10 minutes leave you sweating and panting. Left me feeling like i trained a lil at least today.

Piano was alright, though i was a lil regretful dat i was a lil impatient during scales. I was shutting down and it was tiring. I didn't play up my scales much coz i invested all my time on my pieces. Its quite hurting to see that the pieces only improved a lil but my scales go down the drain this badly. I wasn't expecting it coz i had a grip over scales before. I was tired and frustrated sigh... I will just try better.

I look back to You and ask You, am i biased? Am i treating one better than another? Am i asking and doing the right thing?

Its one of those, i feel lonely but am not alone moments again. I realised that i haven't had a proper heart to heart conversation with anyone that i wanted to yet. I haven't caught up with anyone. I haven't planned anything. All i'm looking forward to is Breakthrough camp coz its my only break from everything.

Sometimes i just wanna run away from everything, but the responsibility is too big and i know that running away solves nothing. Sooner or later, someone's gotta do something. Plus whom shall i fear. I've got myself on the right side :) and i realised that its much easier chasing One nowadays, everything feels a lot lighter :)

Haha, people coming home today! Welcome home, choir pple and sheep and yy! :D

I'm wasting the hols away, everyone else is busy, gosh what the heck is going on! :(

Saturday, November 18, 2006

The LORD is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?

When evil men advance against me
to devour my flesh, ^[a]
when my enemies and my foes attack me,
they will stumble and fall.

Though an army besiege me,
my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
even then will I be confident.

One thing I ask of the LORD,
this is what I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
all the days of my life,
to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD
and to seek him in his temple.

For in the day of trouble
he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle
and set me high upon a rock.

Then my head will be exalted
above the enemies who surround me;
at his tabernacle will I sacrifice with shouts of joy;
I will sing and make music to the LORD.

Hear my voice when I call, O LORD;
be merciful to me and answer me.

My heart says of you, "Seek his face!"
Your face, LORD, I will seek.

Do not hide your face from me,
do not turn your servant away in anger;
you have been my helper.
Do not reject me or forsake me,
O God my Savior.

Though my father and mother forsake me,
the LORD will receive me.

Teach me your way, O LORD;
lead me in a straight path
because of my oppressors.

Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,
for false witnesses rise up against me,
breathing out violence.

I am still confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living.

Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.

Psalm 27.

A true source of inspiration. I love you more and more each day Lord. Thank you for blessing me and being my Saviour.

Choir pple take care! Perak pple take care too!

Service was really ministering and POWERFUL today! Pastor Jeff was a true source of inspiration.

His prescence was amazingly strong today. Lord, i wanna bring them to you!!! Help me!

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Word for life today was great! It reallie reminded my a lot about my Goals for God!!! And gave me new perspectives.

I shall wait for God to let me meet the best partner, He feels is right. And i want to make myself even better, much much better than i am today. When the time comes, i need to lack in so many areas and burden my loved ones but i'll support them and give them a happy life :) I'll serve God with all my heart because He is worth so MUCH MORE than what i am! :D Thank you for Your everlasting love.

I want to LEAD in your name! I want to GROW!

Being a christian may not be the easiest thing in the world, in fact its difficult. But the benefits and the FULFILLMENT is undescribable! When you notice how wrong you are, you feel bad inside and repent on it. But your happy coz God showed you your flaws and you change to show his love for us in a GREATER WAY!

When i am secure in You and when i am committed to all those i love, I shall be ready.

I want to PROTECT, LOVE, MENTOR and LEAD :D

For it is what You made me to do!

Your are King of Kings and Lord of Lords,
God the Almighty, I love you :)

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Had a cup of tea with God
Struggled with my greatest enemy
And returned by His Grace.

If God is always with us, why do we have to ask Him to come unto us? He's already here!
As christians we worshipping God is an everday event, because we love it and its part of us. Its not just singing or praying, but simply believing and trusting in Him. If he is in our minds, we worship God because our actions would be according to His will.

Fighting the same sins in this small heart of mine.

Its all about You and not about me. That was my problem.

Got a new pencil box after roaming and getting lost at PS and city hall. Alone gave peace and serenity, but also gave space for troubles and worries to sneak in. Resenting life is resenting God. I can almost hear the Devil whispering "Yes, go in that direction." Its the realisation of where your thoughts are leading to, which brings you back to His marker onto the right road. Thank God for His grace.

Though it hurts, it is where i must walk. It is like a path of thorns which God has set before me.

I still hope, i still carry that prayer.

The winds have changed and yet the land is still.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

I have done something never done before.

These precious things lying all in one place. I dont know if any of you see it, if anything will change. But I'm shattering this part of me to hopefully move to another.

I've been emo while sorting everything out and thinking about what God has planned for me in this route. I think i've found it.

I've confessed my feelings and everything to the Lord and He gave me peace and comfort. There is nothing more i could ask for and nothing more i SHOULD ask for. For He gave me what i didn't deserve. This mercy, AWESOME MERCY, i love you Lord =)

Confessing.

Enough for today. More for tomorrow.
My soul will take this much.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Realising that maybe its me. Maybe I'm the one who's not there yet. Maybe its not about doing more or making more effort, maybe its just like that coz it is. But i don't wanna give up yet.

Recovering mentally and physically.

When i was taking off my rosary today, i realised that i took it off so much faster than it took me to put it on. Straying from God is so much easier than following Him. But when you follow Him, you know that its the best and the only thing that you'd ever want :) Just like this rosary, declaring that i'm His child is my pride. :)

Contact, Effort and Love. That's what it takes to sustain a r'ship. With God, with frenz, with family.

I'm fading away, ain't I?

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Saturday, November 04, 2006

One more day to OP!

A sore throat and flu is building up and i really hope i'll last till tmr! God heal me please!!! :D:D

A question hit me during service yesterday, about what God meant to me now. I considered the possibilities of my family, friends or even being denied riches in the future. But in the end it didn't really matter. Because i know now that i truly can't live without God :)

Many prayers are being prayed and some are bound to be unanswered, at least for the moment. Something i've prayed for have still not come to pass. Is it time to change the persepective that i'm looking at it? Am i doing it the wrong way? Maybe I should be the one who starts rather than praying that others will move for me.

God has blessed me in so many different ways this week! He gave me tough and tender love! But I'm so glad that He's here with me in an inexplicable way. In a way, His prescence is a blessing, although there's no explaination but i'm sure there's no need for one :)

Talking to my sheep made me realise what i'm saying as well. I taught myself something(?) and yeah, no matter what, no matter what is in my way, i will still continue to do what i think i right. After all, it doesn't really matter what people think.

I pray for YOUR heart and soul.

Thank God for my shep! I can't believe he got me dat chain just because i was talking about it!! ARHHHH! And i didn't notice it till service! Samuel rox:P

Well, I felt God in full force today!!! Haha i Learnt so much from SERVICE as usual! The Holy spirit moves in us all!!

The waves crash onto the rocks from the start of time till now, and it has never given up going over that shore. It will continue to come towards land till the end of time, persevering, unending, with a strength that will never decrease.

We shall walk this together. All the way. Your not alone.

We're a family

Let's do this.

God will bless us.

We are hard pressed from every sides, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandon; struck down; but not destroyed.

2 Corinthians 4:8-9

God bless YOU.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Training was different today. It was fun, i admit, coz we got to play handball o.O and of course the A boys managed to beat the rest rather convincingly ahah :P Think i wonked my leg, might have strained a muscle, my thigh joint feels loose.

Today was tiring to say the least. PW is ending soon!!! Enduring the LAST STRETCH! But i think i'll rather miss those grp meetings after the entire ordeal is over :X haha all the work and editing, all the random laughter we had over random stuff. It was a journey, a great one tho we're quite sick of pw! :P

Was reading PDL that day, when i came to the page which read. Life is made of relationships, of course including our relationship with God(the most impt one of all :))! Love is essential because it is so many things which make up the human character. If you didn't love someone, would you be patient, accept his/her flaws, care for someone, and go the extra mile? Would you ever make frenz if you couldn't do even that?

I really wanna thank God for Boonz, for so many reasons WAHAHHA! Thanks for being my fellow sapien! :P

Even after watching gore so many times, i still can't help but cringe at it. I feel disgusted even at scene which are cut off, my sense of imagination makes it quite real x.x I hate thinking about breaking things and i never want to BREAK anything in my lifetime! I've dislocated stuff a few times and it hurt like nuts. x.x Sometimes i wonder, how far human ambition or obsession can take people. Even to kill? To maim? To destroy? Its just so horrifying that I don't understand it. When we come out to think of it, humans are capable of so much for the wrong reasons. But for the right ones, we never seem to be able to carry it out.

Every thing has its up's and down's, all i have to do is to go down so much that i can only go up right?

With effort anything is possible, coz God looks at the effort :)

For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength.

1 Corinthians 1:25

Corinthians are my fav chapters for some reason. I'm not sure why, but i find it meaningful as i scope through especially treasures in the Jars of Clay.

The holidays seem to mark a more busy period for people... but i hope i'll see some people around at least.

I really hope to have a long chat with YOU, when your less busy... which i hope is soon! Jiayou and keep going! I keep hoping and praying that things will be better!

I am a Child of God.
Amen :D.