Tuesday, August 29, 2006
August 30th, Wednesday

" Do not be anxious about anything, in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God."

-Philippians 4:6-7

" The foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength."

- 1 Corinthians 1:25

" We are pressed from all sides, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed."

-2 Corinthians 4:8-9

"Therefore do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, inwardly we are being renewed day by day."

-2 Corinthians 4:16.

YAY! 4 verses today :D. My bank is increasing :)

Just pia-ed the Geog Term paper out! Its like 1:30am and quite satisfied. Jiayou to Junhua who is still cutting words!!! Although i didn't bother with 1.6k words :P

I pray to God that you'll heal Fungg and Yingtse, coz their both sick with flu so please heal them!!!

I pray for Junhong's ankle as well!!! Hope to see my buddy flying high for MAF!

Danced mass dance again today. A little nostalgic, though i never reallie could dance anyway. But it was fun :) haha carry kenneth and swinging him around.

My wrist isn't feeling very much better but i'm sure it'll heal soon.

Realised my posts are totally random.

I reallie feel happy dat i got to talk to Junhua, Shijia and Kenneth today after school!! Haha, esp Junhua, haven't talked to her for v long le. Although we didn't say much but i guess its nice to find out how she's doing, coz sometimes see her like v busy and stressed and all that but can't understand so can only watch and wonder. But haha, hope to talk to ya again soon!

My guitar playing is coming along pretty well :) I've gotten to playing blessed be your name which is so catchy that i love singing it over and over again! (Probably quite annoying for people arnd me coz i can't sing too :P) But i just love singing esp in God's name!!!

Well, at this moment and time, i can't say i can complain about anything. god really has been my pillar of support as well as all my frenz of course :), but God calms me at the worst times, gives me strength at the times where i feel weak, comforts me when i'm having doubts, I reallie can't say how much i love Him.

His word takes away anger and frustration, because my dad decided that my bro should play instead of letting me finish my Geog paper -.- oh wells. Was pretty frustrated but God's word really soothe the pain and anger... Because His love heals our hearts and souls.:)

Tomorrow's/ Today is wednesday... oh well. I'll post again... erm later today?? :)

GOOD LUCK FOR THE J2s on their prelims!!!!

Thursday, August 24, 2006
August 24th.

I wanna thank Sam,Leon,Fungg for all the support,encouragement and advice yesterday... I was quite impatient and unreasonable yesterday come to think of it. But i'll do my very best. Thanks for Raphael and Huiying for their care & concern as well :)

You came today! I was quite happi :) heh and it was quite enjoyable with you around and seeing you slowly meeting new people and hopefully slowly fitting in... God truly provides :) Maybe i CAN do this after all.

THIS verse really changed everything today.

⁸We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; ⁹persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. ¹

----2 Corinthians 4:8-9

We may be stuck in everything but we are never destroyed for we are in Christ. We can only serve better and do our very best in everything we do. Like we discussed at CG today. We face so many enemies, what can we do? We always have faith and walk on... Never give up, just know that He is Jehovah Jireh, Our Provider.

Learnt a bit of Guitar today! Damn exciting! I wanna learn more!

I really wanna thank Yongsheng, Huiying and Leon as well as David, Steph and Claire for being great studymates! Must say i wouldn't be able to pull through all the tests and wat not without them. Especially my sch mates they are really the people i can count on! Like today we said, Friends are our weapons against the enemy of sch work or something like dat:P

Heh, pretty shagged. Pestasukan on Sunday. Sigh,...

Well post tmr.

Lord i Love you!

Wednesday, August 23, 2006
August 23rd, Wednesday

New responsibilities.

I wish you would stop mentioning it like it 's something trivial.

Although, i understand that its hard since you dun really understand or know yet but i reallie, can't help but feel a lil irritated and annoyed everytime you do that.


I've been living for people more than for You. I just realised how serious its become and its time i changed. I made a promise that night and i intend to keep it. It still felt like only a moment ago, when i made it and i will never forget it.

If this is Your will, i will serve willingly with all my heart.

All my considerations and worries brought down upon others, i'm so sorry.

But i can't help feeling this tight constriction in my heart about this thing.

I can only pray and know that He provides.

But sometimes i wonder... can someone just share about how they feel?

I just wanna run away into Your arms and hide in your prescence for a while... Coz i love You so...

Tuesday, August 22, 2006
August 22nd... Tuesday.

The 26-year-old mother looked at her son who was dying of terminal leukemia. Although her heart was filled with sadness, she had a strong sense of determination to let her son live his dreams. But she knew that the leukemia would see that it would not be possible. But still she wanted her son's dreams to come true.

She took her son's hand and asked, " Bopsy, did you ever think about what you wanted to be when you grew up?'
" Mommy, i always wanted to be a fireman when i grew up."

Mom smiled back and said, " Let's see if we can make your wish come true."

Later that day she went to her local fire department, where she met Fireman Bob. She explained her son's final wish and asked if it would be possible for him to ride around the block on a fire engine.

Fireman Bob said, " We could do better than that. If you can get your son ready by 7 o' clock Wednesday morning, we will make him an honorary fireman for the whole day!"

And they did, giving him his own fire uniform and hat, not toys but the real thing. On that day, they brought him to 3 fire calls, rode in the different fire engines, paramedics' van and even the fire chief's car. He even helped steer the truck back to the fire station. He was in heaven.

Having his dream come true, and all the love and attention that was lavished upon him, so deeply touched was Bopsy that he lived 3 months longer than any doctor thought possible.

One night, all his vital signs dropped drastically and the head nurse began to call his family members to the hospice. Then she remembered the day Bopsy spent as a fireman and she called the fire chief to ask if it was possible to send a fireman in full uniform down to see Bopsy through his transition.

The chief replied," We can do better than that. We'll be there in 5 minutes. Will you please do me a favor? When you hea the sirens screaming, will you announce over the PA system that there is not a fire? It's just the fire department coming to see one of its finest members one more time. And will you open the window to his room? Thanks."

About 5 minutes later, 14 firemen and two firewomen climbed up the ladder into Bopsy's room. With his mother's permission, they hugged him and held him and told him how much they loved him.

With his dying breath, Bopsy looked up at the fire chied and said, " Chief, am i really a fireman now?"

"Bopsy, you are," the chief said.
With those words, Bopsy smiled and closed his eyes for the last time.

This story touched me to tears... such love and care and generosity... for a small life such as Bopsy's and all he wanted was to live his dream.

I can't help but to see the beauty of love... but in reality how much do we see this love?

I can't help it but think that sometimes its so hard to find in people. How much are you willing to sacrifice for another? How much are you willing to care?

God loved us...

I can't help it sometimes to think that death will one day take us. What if we leave regrets behind? Dreams? Loved ones? Sometimes its all the things we love that we left behind that hurts.

What if we miss the chance to tell how much we love each other's company... how much we love this friendship, how much we are grateful to someone's encouragement? Although, we can say cherish your time here, but how many of us truly do that? Can we really do everything we want to? But we could always try.... with a spirit of excellence :)....

So i want to tell you, you, you & you that, I loved our time spent together and since God gave us this one life, let's do our best with it :)...

Saturday, August 19, 2006
Saturday 19th August

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HUIYING!

Heh happy 17th! There goes another birthday. But so happy for my go home partner 2 :) and glad that the cheerful girl's b day is here! Enjoy your b day!

( Well actually her birthday was ytd but anyway....)

Service was reallie meaningful today... Honour our parents and obey them. How much do we actually do that? Not much but yet they do so much for us... we must cherish them so much much much much much more!

We reap what we sow. We cannot reap what we don't sow can we? For everything that we work and pray for the Lord will bless us with it to the best of His ability (which is perfect btw) :P.

Today's service gave me a reallie reallie strong urge to pray. I kept praying and praying without knowing why, i just did coz it came and things came to my mind to pray for. But i truly, truly felt it today.

A field emptiness.
The golden gates are open, rain falling down on the fields.
The barren ground breaks as ripe corn overflows as the seeds burst from the ground.
The golden gates shines like the sun as the corn grows and grows...
Yet spreads its seeds further...
Hoping to create another cornfield...

My heart is scrambled.
I just live life normally without thinking of it.
But when it comes to it.
I guess facing it is a lot tougher.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Tuesday August 15th.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SIMON!

Heh, celebrating his birthday was a real joy for our CG! We missed you brother!

What lies in a person's heart?

We can never be perfect all we can do is try to live to the best we can! Doing the best we can for Him and for ourselves.

How many times do we have to hide?

As we look into our own reflection, what do you see?

I know what i see... and its just not right...

He created us to be perfect yet we chose to be imperfect...
yet he granted grace and mercy.

Yet i am trying so hard for the meaningless...to what end?

When does it stop?

I thirst for your rain Lord...
I need more of it falling and soaking, feeling every drop of warmth slide past.

Secrets locked up tight....

Sunday, August 13, 2006
Sunday, August 13th.

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO KAT AND MJ!

I feel a bit bad that i thot that their birthdays were next week ><. Forgive me ok?! Please! I very scatterbrain le the past week.

Saturday was great! Charmaine came over to Hope! Heh! Hope she had fun! I know i did like always!! Have great faith! God really blessed me this week! After service, i was rushing down for Grad night at Yio Chu Kang, then i realised my EZ link card no cash. After flipping thru my wallet, i had no actual cash as well -.-. At that pt, i was reallie cursing my own carelessness and running back praying God would find a way. And Bing Chen and Rimmel just happened to be at the MRT station! How qiao3 can?! I'm reallie thankful for them!! Coz i got there on time >
Grad night was great tho i reallie screwed up the perf coz i couldn't control my laughter LOL! It was ultimately funny our skit. heh! Sorry to the seniors coz i couldn't stay. Carn't stay out too late for so many nights.

Today, i feel quite proud of myself for doing 7a!!! Thanks to Ys and fungg for being nice study partners! Whee...

Just done with ILP!!! And its like 12.26 am sigh... Time for bed... when everything gets fixed!

Oh well, tough week ahead! Cya!!

I hear your Word.
I Have Faith.
Please give me this strength
For you are my Lord and Almighty
And i want to serve you with all i can...

Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Still August 8th!

I found the story from Service! It was on Eelee's blog! Haha, its so meaningful and touching... About how foolish we are sometimes as humans and how much God loves us!

The Wemmicks were small wooden people. Each of them was carved by a woodworker named Eli. His workshop sat on a hill overlooking their village.


Every Wemmick was different. Some had big noses; others had large eyes. Some were tall and others were short. Some wore hats; others wore coats. But all were made by the same carver and all lived in the village.


And all day, every day, the Wemmicks did the same thing: They gave each other stickers. Each Wemmick had a box of golden star stickers and a box of grey dot stickers. Up and down the streets all over the city, people could be seen sticking stars or dots on one another.


The pretty ones, those with smooth wood and fine paint, always got stars. But if the wood was rough or the paint chipped, the Wemmicks gave dots. The talented ones got stars, too. Some could lift big sticks high above their heads or jump over tall boxes. Still others knew big words or could sing very pretty songs. Everyone gave them stars.


Some Wemmicks had stars all over them! Every time they got a star it made them feel so good that they did something else and got another star. Others, though, could do little.


They got dots.


Punchinello was one of these. He tried to jump high like the others, but he always fell. And when he fell, the others would gather around and give him dots. Sometimes when he fell, it would scar his wood, so the people would give him more dots. He would try to explain why he fell and say something silly, and the Wemmicks would give him more dots.


After a while he had so many dots that he didn't want to go outside. He was afraid he would do something dumb such as forget his hat or step in the water, and then people would give him another dot. In fact, he had so many grey dots that some people would come up and give him one without reason.


"He deserves lots of dots," the wooden people would agree with one another. "He's not a good wooden person." After a while Punchinello believed them. "I'm not a good Wemmick," he would say. The few times he went outside, he hung around other Wemmicks who had a lot of dots. He felt better around them.


One day he met a Wemmick who was unlike any he'd ever met. She had no dots or stars. She was just wooden. Her name was Lulia. It wasn't that people didn't try to give her stickers; it's just that the stickers didn't stick. Some admired Lulia for having no dots, so they would run up and give her a star. But it would fall off. Some would look down on her for having no stars, so they would give her a dot. But it wouldn't stay either.


"That's the way I want to be," thought Punchinello. 'I don't want anyone's marks.' So he asked the sticker-less Wemmick how she did it.
"It's easy," Lulia replied. "Everyday I go to see Eli."
"Eli?"
"Yes, Eli. The woodcarver... I sit in the workshop with him."
"Why?"
"Why don't you find out for yourself? Go up the hill. He's there." And with that the Wemmick with no marks turned and skipped away.


"But he won't want to see me!" Punchinello cried out. Lulia didn't hear. So Punchinello went home. He sat near a window and watched the wooden people as they scurried around giving each other stars and dots. "It's not right," he muttered to himself. And he resolved to go see Eli.
He walked up the narrow path to the top of the hill and stepped into the big shop. His wooden eyes widened at the size of everything. The stool was as tall as he was. He had to stretch on his tiptoes to see the top of the workbench. A hammer was as long as his arm.


Punchinello swallowed hard. "I'm not staying here!" and he turned to leave.


Then he heard his name.
"Punchinello" The voice was deep and strong.
Punchinello stopped.
"Punchinello! How good to see you…Come and let me have a look at you."
Punchinello turned slowly and looked at the large bearded craftsman.
"You know my name?" the little Wemmick asked.
"Of course I do. I made you."


Eli stooped down and picked him up and set him on the bench.
"Hmm," the maker spoke thoughtfully as he inspected the grey circles.
"Looks like you've been given some bad marks."
"I didn't mean to, Eli. I really tried hard."
"Oh, you don't have to defend yourself to me, child. I don't care what the other Wemmicks think."
"You don't?"
"No, and you shouldn't either. Who are they to give stars or dots? They're Wemmicks just like you. What they think doesn’t matter, Punchinello. All that matters is what I think. And I think you are pretty special."


Punchinello laughed. "Me, special? Why? I can't walk fast. I can't jump. My paint is peeling. Why do I matter to you?"


Eli looked at Punchinello, put his hands on those small wooden shoulders, and spoke very slowly."Because you're mine. That's why you matter to me."

Punchinello had never had anyone look at him like this - much less his maker. He didn't know what to say.
"Every day I've been hoping you'd come." Eli explained.

"I came because I met someone who had no marks"

"I know. She told me about you."

"Why don't the stickers stay on her?"

"Because she has decided that what I think is more important than what they think. The stickers only stick if you let them."

"What?"

"The stickers only stick if they matter to you. The more you trust my love, the less you care about the stickers."

"I'm not sure I understand."

"You will, but it will take time. You've got a lot of marks. For now, just come to see me every day and let me remind you how much I care."

Eli lifted Punchinello off the bench and set him on the ground.

"Remember," Eli said as the Wemmick walked out the door. "You are special because I made you. And I don't make mistakes."


Punchinello didn’t stop, but in his heart he thought, "I think he really means it."
And when he did, a dot fell to the ground.

August 8, Tuesday

National day celebrations was quite alright because of the company (of 06A13!!!) and because of the hilarious plays by Artemis and Athena.

After that, went with Guobin, The King( you know who la, name undisclosed due to reasons) :), Kenneth and Fuji to watch Dragon Tiger Gate. Its reallie an ACTION flick. read... ACTION. Me and Guobin were like niao-ing it thruout becoz there was a lack of storyline and it was totally hilarious how somethings turned out.

Halfway thru the show, when this guy was lying in flowers
Jon: " Where's the storyline arh?? i dun get it..."
GB: " Don't worry... I'm still searching for it."

After the movie,
GB: " Those two guys learn new move for wad! They extra arh! Learn le oso bei own."
KL: " The guy with the Golden Bell thing at least the bad guy say "Not Bad." The electric drill no use one, the guy says "Its embarassing." Like dat learn for wad?"

The experience was extremely funny. Guobin now understands that if we sit together its gonna be super leng3 thru out the movie LOL!

HAD SHEPHERDING TODAY!! YAY!!!

Sam happened to be down at KAP so i went to join him. Thank you for teaching so much today!! Today's session was reallie meaningful and applicable to life... really gave me insights to life. Found a new favourite verse! :D I really look forward to the next session.

Be satisfied with what God gives us! Do what we can with it and we will be entrusted with more when we grow! Trust in God! Don't get caught up in your dreams and forget to do what you have to!

Friends always want the best for their friends.

Can you tell who is a true friend?

Haha Can't wait for CG OUTING TMR!!! TO SENTOSA!!! :DD

Wheee post tmr!!!

Sunday, August 06, 2006
Sunday, August 6th

The spots only stay if you want them to....

Eelee gave a really meaningful service yesterday! And it really touched my heart... because how true it is that humans are affected by other people's views on them.... Yet we always forget that Our creator always loves us yet we forget about his view about us and keep feel sad for ourselves. God is always there, watching over us... no matter whether you feel Him or not, He is there!! I love you Lord! :)

We live by faith and not by sight of YOU!

If you have faith, why do you need to feel Him before you believe?

Went to my first Festival of praise on Friday and it was BREATHTAKING! Totally amazing looking at thousands of people in Singapore sing in His NAME!!! Its so cool!! The sermon message was so strong. Its time for the younger generation to step up! Are we ready?? We've got to be because it is our generation and we have to do something about it!

WELCOME JIEXUN! My new go-home partner! :D:D Y-hope and Child of GOD!! :D

I worry so much for you... my dear friend... i brought you here yet i'm not sure whether you really believe... How do you feel? Can i ask? Or am i being too oppressive to do even that? I just want the best for you!! Cause i know the Lord has been good for me! I can't force you into things nor do i want to give you any pressure for this is a decision you must make alone. Why do you need things to be difficult so that you can accept them? I wish i had help... I can't do this alone... Oh Lord please touch the hardest heart and soften it to your seed so that we may sow it well to be a plant on fertile land!

Today went to watch the choir perform in Jurong, woke up bright and early to go with Jiexun, then reached there and met Leon. They really put up a good performance tho the crowd was a bit sian.... x.x but at least it was cool :P aha! Xiang was a bit late for the perf but we had tons of fun playing cards at the Kopitiam! Blackjack snap!!! Ahahhaa! Laughed so hard that i think i going to have abs ler!@ But seriously i love these caregroup mates of mine, because they make me laugh, they stand by me, but most importantly because they are MY FAMILY in Christ! We're one big family which is why we can do all these dumb but fun things together. I'm reallie sorry if i've hurt them with my actions or words... or I've done wrong things... but I reallie think you guys are the best family anyone could have! HCCG!

After that, went to study with Leon, Huiying, Claire, David Hoe, Steph and Wei Song! It was quite fun la! Only started studying with them recently but it's reallie great knowing them. They're super high and funny but serious in their work as well. I reallie hope to know those outside HCCG better in time to come. Their quite cool ;) :D and fun to be with. You guys rock!

At 10 o clock, it was only Leon, huiying and me left at Mac's. They were desperately trying to finish their chem tutorial while i was partially stoning/studying econs/ thinking about stuff for holy comm(dunno why more ideas)/church stuff. But after a while i realised that it was reallie interesting watching Leon try to teach Huiying ahah :D It reminded so much of me and CQ last yr. Him desperately saving me from imminent death to sciences coz he was so good at it. He never gave up on me. He just kept on helping me even if it meant he had to sacrifice his own study time the night before or a few days before. He reallie is one of the best frenz i've ever had! I really miss him hah... But its so nice reliving those memories. I remember i was like in Huiying's shoes back then snickering like an idiot with half insane laughter coz i couldn't understand a word of chem! Then he would call me for help for languages mostly but not so often ahhaa. But it was fun testing him ting1 xie3!! Coz we would laugh at each other for making dumb mistakes or reading words in weird accents! I wish i had someone like that now... a study partner, a friend, a person who i could laugh and feel free with. I know its better to study alone for some people... I understand... haha... But i wish there was a person like CQ and Leon to me now... Leon's a very gd teacher btw :) haha... but we take diff subs... too bad haha...

It is another week. A holiday filled one.

Can't wait for CG outing to Sentosa...

I'm still looking for you....

Thursday, August 03, 2006
3rd August

God is truly...... Amazing!

Blessings:

1) Found my laptop Thank God!
2) Lee Yang replaced peer tutoring! I'm so sorry shumin x.x i really think i made a wrong decision coz i didn't anticipate CG or church >.<
3) Somehow we scraped thru geog.
4) Things don't seem so heavy
5) NO TRAINING TMR!
6) FESTIVAL OF PRAISE IS TMR!
7) CAREGROUP ROCKED!
8) We have new believers in CG! Welcome Kai Sheng and Huiying! :D

Huiying! It was so nice to see you at CG la! Haha! So glad to see you came after all :) Glad you enjoyed it and WELCOME!!! Yay next time got new "go home" mate on same side :D! She's like how nice can? :):)

God makes miracles everywhere! :)

Today, one question was remember once when you felt God's love or something like dat. Heard really nice testimonies especially Tracy's! Thinking about it the stars ARE like God's love. Ever watching down upon us whether we see them or not... its so wonderful.... :D

For me... i thought about it.... and i realised that one thing which made me feel truly loved by God is because of friends around me. Those friends who were always true and by my side making me smile. Wanna thank Junhong and Guobin especially for yesterday's dinner! Comforted me a lot about the laptop :) I love all my CG MATES! They reallie are my pillar of support! The Judo team too :D ahaha all the sweat and blood we went thru together! :D

Waking up every morning is a show of God's love as well. He gave us everything in life we have... How could we not feel his love?

I've been so scatterbrained recently... nearly losing my laptop THRICE... leaving my geog notes in the Geog room.... I think i've officially become the no.1 scatterbrained person... But recently, been feeling rather strained... Been forgetting to do lots of stuff i'm s'posed to do and stoning when i can. I'm like a lil weary... of stuff... Of all the problems. But i guess all i can do is persevere. I'm sorry if i act weird and hurt people... i'm just not feeling very myself recently at times... =/

I hope things will be alright for Yan soon...

And For God so loved us, He gave His one and only son to die on the cross for us.

In you i trust my life and soul Lord.

Please bless them all.

Amen :)

Wednesday, August 02, 2006
Wednesday, August 2nd

Wednesday's proved to be my least liked day.

A lot of things went wrong...

1. need to a find a replacement for peer tutoring tmr.
2. Geog tut due tmr morning. One essay 3 DRqs
3. Laptop disappeared.
4. Games not reallie done.

Rushing thru them now.

and its midnight.

Oh God please help me!

ARHHHH!