Friday, June 30, 2006
June 30th friday.

CG today rocked! Although i was bushed x.x But it was so nice to come together and have fellowship and stuff so fun! :D

Service day TMR!!!!!

The day i accepted Christ was the day my new eyes opened for the first time....

Half of my soul separated from me at birth,
And i wish it found...
The emptiness of a prescence.
The missing piece the the puzzle.
I long.
I trouble.
I wonder.
I think.
I smile.
I pray.
I wish.

Waiting for a half to come along.....:)

Thursday, June 29, 2006
June 29th! Blox mostly over!

First Block Tests almost OVER~!

Left lit which i probably won't spend too much time studying!

I wanted to post yesterday!! But couldn't really come online because of the maths test... (the horror!) just glad its over!!!

I AM SO GLAD FOR JESSIE! Haha, haven't talked to her for more than a year or two and finally caught up with her. Getting married and having a kid, God truly blessed her :) I'm so happy for her la!!! HAHA! Oh i pray that she will have a happy life ahead of her!I'm looking forward to the arrival of the little one!! Haha she promised to send me a photo YAY! ahahahha. Dunno why i so excited oso!

Maths was a killer period.

Class outing was great! Scary movie 4 was... erm.... spastic? It got lame after a while. But i still love the " mitsubishi, toshiba, kamikaze, BANZAI! SASHIMI!!!!" Lol!

Sometimes i wish that these feelings would just go away,
When you try so hard to change it around and nothing happens.
You wish things turned out different,
But time doesn't turn back.
No one can help you,
Nor can they console you.
But you must face it,
And let the Lord bring you thru.

"Friends will accept you for who you are....." Quote... from someone :)

How long is the wait for a prayer?
A question so many people ask in hope, in temptation, in desperation.
No one knows the answer for only He knows.
But i do know one thing.
Have faith.
Persevere.
Listen to His word.
For it is our guidance, our light and salvation.

You reach out only to be stopped at your tracks.
How weird it is sometimes when you lose your ability to react...
At the wrong times,
at the wrong places,
Losing your bearing,
offending someone,
feeling guilty,
feeling helplessness when you can't help someone,
wishing, always, always like every human does, hoping for more,
that you could do more.

But all we can do is pray.
And pray in Your name, Lord,
To bless this person, to give one happiness and peace.

Amen.

Life changes all the time.
Its what you make of it that's important.

Haha i wish i could follow my own thoughts. I shall try to make most of my life....

Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Jun 28th

Its midnight. After mugging the entire day desperately trying to finish Geog, i decided i should just skim thru and try my best tmr.

Jonathan Lwee -- [noun]: An immortal 'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Look at this lame thing.

Oh wells. Continue muggin then LIGHTS OUT!

Monday, June 26, 2006
June 26th

You are my Oasis in the desert, my light in the dark, my water when i Thirst. You are my GOD.

Econs was horrible! Stupid case study so difficult! But essay was much better! :D:D

I miss service today! AGAIN!

God sees all of us equally. He loves us all equally. And His great love cannot be measured.

Courage comes in many forms. For many purposes. How do you use your courage? For stupid dares? Or in His name? How is it that we manage to do it more for dares than to do it in His name? Why do we persist and hold back for Him?

This is a story. There were 3 people. A man, a teenager and a boy. They were asked a question," How much do u love your beloved?"

The man replied, " I love my beloved till the end of time."

The teenager replied, " I love my beloved a lot."

The child simply smiled and as a child does to express he held up his hands to measure his love. He held up his left hand and left his right hand down and said, " I love my beloved this much."

Who is your beloved?

Children come up with the most innocent but impactful expressions....

Could you put down dislike, anger, hatred, malice, lust, greed and envy for simple faith and happiness and love?

We come into this world, with nothing.
We come into this world as dust and return to dust, with nothing.
The only thing we leave behind is,
the things we did for this world,
And the love we left with our loved ones,
and our Love for Him which we bring up to the heavens.

God Bless you all, my friends.

Saturday, June 24, 2006
June 24th

I love saturdays!!!

Service rox...!!!!!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SUET! :D

I was looking forward to today so much! I missed CG coz of judo camp -.- and after 3 days of being cut off from the world, here i am back in "civilisation"! Service was great as usual :P And i loved Praise and worship so much! Finally, i hear "My God" being played! And " All my love" as well!

A few more days to blox....

Been mugging hard! Haven't started on geog tho... GG! But finally nearly done with econs!! Left COST THEORY WHOO! Maths oso only series and seq and functions. P&C just read thru.

I reallie loved today.

Can you see and feel the Holy Spirit pouring down on us today on high?
Like a fountain of light,
In his holiness,
the warm prescence of the Lord,
Touches my heart and covers me in His great arms.

Just a simple " I love you." means a lot. ^^

JiAyou everyone for blox!!!

Tuesday, June 20, 2006
June 20th!

Today was quite usual... mugged the afternoon off with Church peeps :D.

Thanks for Yen Shao for his help in math and Thank You Xiang yu for your encouragement :D

Once again its one day to doomsday. But for the Gold :D

One last stretch.

One last lap.

People realise trust goes two ways.
But would anyone be able to take the initiative to take the first step?
Even when they do, will the other reciprocate?
No one knows which is why most people don't try.
Will you be one of those who do?

The same thing applies to respect i noticed.

A simple smile brightens up a person's day.
It's up to the person whether he gives it or not.

Often people notice things but do not speak of it,
So others take it that they didn't know it.
Dreadfully wrong they are yet they do not know

We cannot judge who is right or wrong. Only the Lord can.
What we can do is base it on our own opinions and accept what we feel is right.
Or we could simply cherish the right and help and love the wrong.
There's always a choice on how to do something.
Its whether you make it or not.

haha awfully weird post i know... but somethings are said in weird things which might not make any sense. Oh and please this post is neutral :P just simply thoughts by a youth...

Monday, June 19, 2006
June 19th!

2 Days before camp... bleahx...

tooopid mj tag this on me x.x

Golden Rules:
[x] Do the following WITHOUT complaint.
[x] Choose 5 person to do this after you completed yours.
[x] Leave a tag on the person's tagboard to say he/she have been tagged.
[x] Start your post with "I have been tagged!" then do this.
Your 10 Favourites::
Favourite Colour-- Blue but starting to have a liking for Orange
Favourite Food -- Lemon Tea... is not food but its the only part of Food i can think of now.
Favourite Song-- Currently: God Is Moving " hillsongs."/ Ai de jiu shi ni " lee hom"
Favourite Movie-- FF7: Advent Children/ Constantine
Favourite Sport-- Bball... has always been basketball...
Favourite Season-- Winter
Favourite Day of the week-- Sunday
Favourite Ice-cream Flavour-- Rum Raisin/ Chocolate peanut buttercup
Favourite Book-- The Belgariad
Favourite anime/cartoon-- Manga- Flame of Recca. Anime: GS/Fate/Stay

9 currents::Current mood-- Sian... Bored... Tired. But calm.
Current clothes-- Erm sleeping clothes?
Current desktop-- Windows wall paper.... or you talking about the nice table here... hmmm or is it dat photo... :P
Current Toe-nail colour-- errr normal? you expect me to say purple?
Current Time-- 11:10 pm
Current Annoyance(s)-- Camp is two days away.
Current thought-- Why am i doing this crap...
Current boyfriend/ girlfriend-- My imaginary one. Her name is me....
Current book you are reading-- The Crystal Gorge by David Eddings. Actually just finished. Pretty good.
8 Firsts::
First Best Friend-- Dunno which came first. Eugene/TKH
First Crush-- XY.
First Movie-- Erpz. Dunno.
First Piercing-- In my head. Mugging pierced my poor little brain matter and gave me a headache.
First Lie-- I ate my homework. j/k... carn rmbr
First Music-- Har? Music can count on arh? How i rmbr baby dat time...
First Car-- hot wheels leading the way!!!!!
First Handphone-- Nokia 8250 a.k.a the cockroach, laobusi
Lasts::
Last Cigarette-- Plz smoking not good for health. I despise smoking. Principles.
Last Drink-- Water
Last Car Ride-- Today, Taxi.... rushing to piano
Last Crush-- slowly go and figure out....
Last movie seen-- e(X) NS (Men)-3 ( in (brackets)
Last Phone Call-- Long Kuan, to ask where i am.
Last CD played-- Burnt CD. Chao ta... ya inside mostly random songs and Hillsongs.
Have you evers::
Have you ever dated one of your best friends-- All the time?? "Eh want go mug not?"
Have you ever broken the law-- Playing soccer in void deck, get chased by police, drink wine...
Have you ever been arrested-- Nope, close tho.
Have you ever skinny-dipped-- skinny? No i not skinny. Dip in what? Chocolate arh? wait sticky... then waste choco ji err...
Have you ever been on TV-- Accidentally yes.
Have you ever kissed someone u didnt know-- No. Lame.

5 things you are wearing:
1. Long pants
2. Shirt...
3. Specs
4. a wig (right.... believe me jiu hao:))
5. my skin

4 things you've done today

1. Studied with Roasted dumps
2. Had piano...
3. Mugged with LK
4. getting irritated with people watching World Cup screaming at every lil thing...

3 Things you can hear rite now
1. Silence. -.-
2. Vehicles on the road abt 100m away.
3. "Click, Click, Click" my keyboard talking to my fingers.

2 things you cant live without
1. Friends & Family
2. music

Things you do when you are bored: Surf Net... stone...

5 people to do this quiz!
1. Junhong
2. Fungg
3. Tracee
4. Yvonne
5. Charm

Heh :D:D Oh wells... not enough people to tag de.

So happy i did something constructive today but unfortunately there is only a 10% chance of survival for blocks. Woot. Yay.

Sunday, June 18, 2006
June 18th. home Alone.

When you've always wanted freedom... when you have it things get sort of lonely.

Haven't spoken to anyone face to face all day... then probably dat made me feel a bit cranky.

Or maybe not. Brains a little woozy today after chatting till 3 ytd. Slept at 4 and woke up at 10 sigh.... >.<

I reallie had a huge urge to go to church today... i just needed God more.... but i couldn't and didn't... My circuits are fried and totally hung out dry...

Got hit hard by spyware today and tried to fix it... to no avail.

I NEED to get out of the house.

On a happier note, mugging seems to have made progress! Managed to finish most of econs... only left the last few tricky parts and i can move on to maths and Geog. Can just forget abt lit... read the text later...

Love is Patient, Love is Kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes and always perseveres.
1 Corinthians verse 13:4-7.

This verse reached out to me today. Thanks to Carl's little book. And it gave me relief of my Thirst...

Love is such a controversy. "Love is blind", " Love is bittersweet", " Love is like chocolates"... But this verse truly spoke of Love in its essence. The strength of it and the power... some people think Love is a weakness, a chink in the armour for people in so many stories and such, especially in stories of deceit and lies. But Love is a blessing. It is peaceful. It doesn't hate it isn't self-centered and cares for others. Loving others more than oneself at times... But the power and strength of One who loves is great and is gifted by God.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes and always perseveres...

I think i wanna get a little book as well!!! And i need a new pencilbox!!

Hope i can get one after piano tmr! :D

Post later :)

Friday, June 16, 2006
June 16th

Today was physically tiring!!

Went for training in the morning. It was so quiet la... the junoirs dun even noe how to respond. Dunno to feel frustrated or angry or disappointed... Especially coz its so tiring to shout and train and try to keep the spirit up with just the senoirs alone. Just wish they would understand that the future depends on them... Oh wells just have to work harder then! The Lord will provide!

Then finally went to have fun!!!! Finally learnt Ice skating!!!! So fun!! Hah now can skate A BIT onlee... A BIT! Hah! Like half walk half skate! Then kept on falling down! But thanks to Qikun and Chengqi i didn't fall like crazy! Hah!! But we laughed so much la! So comical! Me and Cq spinning circles to stop ourselves but in de end still fell down on the cold and wet ice!!! Then we scared this bunch of little kids by accident :P Coz they skated past us then we nearly fell but didn't then they screamed and fell!!! Omgosh!! haha so guilty but we were laughing like crazy.

One of the more dangerous falls of mine included:

Although i ended up laughing like nuts again coz it was so cold and fun but i nearly bang-ded my head on the railing! AHHHHHH!

I ended up freeze my arse off ( literally!) and looking at small kids own us by skating at ultra fast speeds. But its so nice!!! I wanna go again!! Skating! I bet Kylie must be super pro! hah she train so many years le!

Now i'm aching quite a bit lol... hope i'll be ready for training tmr! Will be alone from Sunday to tuesday at home coz parents will be in Genting... heh Oh wells.... Hope someone will be there to study and do stuff with me. Well cya for now:D

Thursday, June 15, 2006
Interview!!!!

Look At all the delicious..... woot food!!! I love coffee bean and Ms Fannie Tan was absolutely cool! haha Our PW grp rox!!! :D She reallie gave us a lot of insights and new ideas for our project and info too and Ms Tan was reallie far-sighted... She was so hospitable la!! We were not expecting this seriously but wooohoooo!!!! Lol!

CG was so fun!!! We'll miss Simon tho.... haha all the best in YWAM!!! But its so nice to see the Central people again. Central rox!!! HCCG rox too!!! We tau-poked Simon as a farewell gift :P.
I can't wait for Saturday!!

I'll be alone from Sunday to Tuesday... parents going off to Genting. I don't wanna go la... prolly catch up with studies or something but the house will be empty sigh...

In You i have faith.

Sometimes i say things i don't mean. The phrasing is wrong... the tone too... I think i did again today. And i feel so guilty now. I want to change in His name and for myself as well. I hope to touch others and let them smile as well. So hypocritical it may sound, so impossible but it is a wish nonetheless.

Still your neighbourhood smile producer (wannabe).

Hang in there and bless you all my friends.

Wednesday, June 14, 2006
June 14th!!!

Class outing in a long time!!! To marche!!! it was good! First time truly eating there la, the food was exxxx but dammm nice!!! All thanks to our class vouchers ahahahhaa!!! YAY! :D

WELCOME BACK YVONNE! :D

Heard she just came back from Malaysia haha so there :D.

According to a insight by Jeriel, Jonathan is hyper when he gets home and in front of his comp.

I think it is likely so!!! :P ahaha.

Been terrorizing people of late but i get worried that once school starts i just can't keep SMILING anymore... so i might as well do as much of it in the hols as possible. Talking about smiling its kinda hard to do while cracking your head on math >.<>Some things are too much to ask.

The feeling of making people unhappy reallie sucks. But the way your face changes when i say anything makes me quite sad but its ok. If you just wanna do it dat way its ok with me i guess. Coz its your loss that you want to have it dat way. I just rather smile. :) So be happy.

Cheers to everyone!

To Jinqi: Eh when they sell Jon-in-a-dustbin figurines right? they will sell better than Hard Gay HOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!~~~~~~~~~~ One day 300,00 yen :P AHAHHAHAHA press le got crazy cackles of laughter!!! AHAHHA! Sorry a bit nutty :D


look at the fries O.O! heh random pic

Tuesday, June 13, 2006
June 13th!

Today was quite cool la! Went for combined then nvr expected sir to let us off PT!!! WOOT!

Managed to make it for Word FOR LIFE!!!! OMG! I'm so surprised Sam put me in Careleader's training! Paiseh a bit blur and gong-ing around. But i will do my best for His kingdom! Trying to learn whatever they are teaching becoz i missed so much and i think i will miss more -.-... so sad...:(

I was HIGH and HYPER a moment ago laaa.... Trying to get people to high too. Being Happy is so nice. But now lose gas ler...

God's Love is Eternal! :D Amen!

Went for Matt's performance (MATT LEH although we prefer to call him Alex or Q****) was okay... not too bad. But so nice seeing the Russia people again!!! Kylie, Helen, Yuanshan, Galven, Fish, Li Heng... super zai la! Heh we had our jokes and stuff so fun! Hah i miss Russia too!!!

Now pondering whether i should go for maths or for CLC tmr!!!

God please give me a sign!!

Matthew 4:4... heh a verse to remember for me.

Thank You Jinqi for reminding me of simple faith!!! Just Have faith. And never give up. Just gogogogogoogogogogogogog.............. and nvr stop coz when you stop its a fatal mistake.

Daniel PLZ GET WELL SOON!!!!!! And TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!!!!

Heh!!!

Need sleep think i post tmr! WOOT



Random photo of me and DACKS :D ahahahha Taken ages ago with his mac. I just find our friendship so amazing and lasting thru all these years. Dacks rox! AHAHHAHA. Pizza hut delievery ding dong.

Monday, June 12, 2006
June 12th.

I still haven't given up the idea of being a smile producer.

Although i'm less hyper today, which is a good sign.

Thought of the day:
Good things never last. But if you think about it, Bad things never last too. The only thing that lasts is the love that God gives us and our spirit which never gives up.

I was sho very stressed... and was very irritable at the later end of the day for i have-no-idea-what-reason. I just felt this constriction in my chest and just couldn't think coherently. Just very worried coz i kept feeling that i had a lot to do. I prayed and it felt slightly better. Thank God for giving me this sister (:P) who helped me through this time and gave me interesting and somewhat different advice. It really helped me see things in a new light i guess.

I feel lots better thank you so much!

The choices in one's life are never easy lor i guess haha but we just have to make them and not run away from them.

Psalms 23....
Encounter!

HAHA LOOK AT THE FRIES AND BURGERSS!! :D YUMM!

heh some random photos i just uploaded. I feel so much better and i think i'm starting to get hyper again >.<>

ALRIGHT! POST LATER!

Sunday, June 11, 2006
After 18 hrs of sleep...

I'm finally awake... x.x

19 hrs of sleep later!

OMG I'm hyper and terrorizing a lot of people on MSN :D:D:D:D:D:DOMG!!!!!!!!!! :D YAY!

haha i have a new dream of being A SMILE PRODUCER!

Although i'm not even close to the standard yet, I SHALL WORK TOWARDS IT! :D:D

YAY!!!

YAY!

Hyperness is taking over!

WHOOOOO!

AHAHHAA!

ok this post is crazy but i'm bored and HYPER so there :D:D:D

Saturday, June 10, 2006
ENCOUNTER!

7th to 10th of June 2006 will be one of the most memorable dates in my life.

" Tell the world that Jesus lives,
Tell the world that, Tell the world that,
Tell the world that he died for them,
Tell that world that he lives again!"

Encounter was so amazing, i can't stop the describe the experiences that i went thru, the people that i've come to know. It's just so amazing and so memorable. To hear God. To know the people around me and to truly, truly change me.

Day One:
I was rather late because of training. When i reached there, everyone was at the stadium playing games and the games were rather fun, funny and physical :P however it really helped to know more people in our district and our caregrp! :D I played the first event, the telematch styled game. The guys event was really quite hiong la! We had to full up this bottle with a ping pong ball in it full of water with a cup only with our mouths holding the cup. Then run like 500m around the track come back and eat half a watermelon with only our mouths >.<>" Have Faith."

The UL told me the exact same thing like less than a moment later and i was so TOUCHED by it! He truly touched me that night and i want so much to be able to do His work and touch other people's lives. Having faith in Him and knowing that this will make everything alright really comforts me. It's such a warm and simple thing that i can do and love to do!

Another really happy thing that happened is Yvonne and Fungg were Holy spirit baptised!!! :D
Congratulations!!!!

I was praying for so many things, so many people, so many praises, so many blessings! I really thank the Lord for listening to me, even though i am a sinner, even though that i may not be worthy of His great love but he listened and made these things come true.

I love God :D

Day 3:

Went for training again tho i felt horrible. Throat was sore like crazy, sneezing and coughing. After that i went to get my retainers and finally back for camp!! By the time i came back i was exhausted. But when i came back and watched Bring it on!, i was quite refreshed! :D Haha it was so cool and so funny at times :)! After that we had Ignite!!!! It was like the highlight of the day la!!! I was so damn high!!! We jumped and praised and jumped and jumped and jumped WHOOOO! The voices echoed in His name and we sang.

The Lord told me a few things on Day 3.

To what i wished and thirsted to happen: Be Patient.

To what i wished to do for Him: Passion.

To serve Him with whatever my abilities can do for Him. To care for others and to do what i could for them. Its what i can do and what i will :D

I am SO GLAD that i went for ENCOUNTER! I got to know so many people better... Yongsheng, Leon, Robert, Ryan, Samuel (my shepherd!!! :D), Raphael, Jinqi, Xiang Yu, Nicole, Joanne, the 06a13--ers, Fungg, Tracee and Yvonne, Eugene (woo-man:P) and so many others... the list goes on and on. But it is such a blessing to have them around!

P.S Tracy get well soon!!!! God bless you!

Acts 2:17-18
" In the last days, God says, I will pour out my Spirit on all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy, your young men will see visions, your old men will dream dreams. Even on my servants, both men and women, i will pour out my spirit in those days, and they will prophesy."

Tuesday, June 06, 2006
The day before ENCOUNTER! :D:D:D

I have decided.

I have to go for training tomorrow.

In order to give myself to Him for the next 3 days without any worries or troubles.

Prayer and reflection.

Give yourself to me fresh, clean and ready...

Words that are echoing in my head somewhat now. And i think i shall do just that.

I know i have to do it. And i feel so much better knowing why and how i must do it.

Thank you, Lord.

I am ready for ENCOUNTER!

Are you? :D

Saturday, June 03, 2006
June 3rd!!!!

Rain down, Rain down...

God's rain drenched me heavily today at service! After two weeks of the lack of Cgs and services due to me in Russia, I never noticed how much i truly missed Him. But when i stepped into service today, i felt the emotions rushing out of me like a flood. I was drenched by the Holy Spirit as I encountered Him. What touched me more was for all the days i was not here, not there for Him, when i came back here, God only welcomed me back as his child. I felt the guilt so bad... I wanted to just let my feelings out and I guess i did ^^

THE WORLD NEEDS A REVIVAL!
Pastor Jeff talked about revival today and i guess it was quite new to me. I felt its true. Everyone needs a revival because God poured his Holy Spirit to us, we are sinners who are less deserving should accept it. For His Grace has touched us all....

Finally, we had Baptism of the Spirit! And He touched me today!! I was just glad and excited and I just couldn't stop praying thanks to God and to all the care leaders and shepherd :P who helped me along. Daniel, Raphael, Xiang Yu, Jinqi, Tracee and of course Sam, my shepherd who never introduced himself as my shepherd -.- :P. Thank You for all you've done to help me along, Daniel who makes me feel comfortable with his concern for me :D, Raphael who comes to talk to me every now and then helping me along during service, Xiang Yu who is always cheerful :D, Jinqi who is always saying "HI!" and making things so lighthearted :D, Tracee, who brought me back and helped me along all these days :P:P, finally Sam(!) who has thought me more about the Lord with all his morning sms-es of messages from the Bible, all his concerned questions on how i'm coping with stuff and his care for how i am. I thank all my friends too who helped me along all these days.

Fungmin, Jiayou :D in God's Plan, you have it in you. It will come when the time is right so don't give up and stay strong :) You can do it! :D

Heh, I'm so touched by the greatness of God today and finally,

Friday, June 02, 2006
Finally home... Is something wrong?

Returned. Battered. Bruised. Bleeding. But Alive.

Home. A single word. Having somewhere to return to.

Camp. Wasn't as bad as expected. Was one of the slacker camps. Doesn't mean it wasn't as tough or gruelling as any of those past. Blood and tears. I hope it made a difference that it'll be all worthwhile. Blood and tears, literally.

The dread i felt for camp naturally played on thru before camp and during camp. I feel that this is truly some of the times where my faith to Him, my will and my limits are tested, pushed and stretched to the limits.

Last 4 camps. All the senoirs feel it, i guess. We grumble about the pain, the time wasted, the cold at night, but i think everyone feels the closeness of the suffering we go through. At the end of the day when you hear people gritting their teeth in the shower, everyone showing abrasions scratches and bruises, it's not really of complaint but just to share how things are so similar for all of us.

I'm so proud of my batch!

We might not have been the best, or been champions YET but we've stuck through it. I remember how many people gave up on the way. From a batch of more than 20 people, down to just the 6 of us. So many times, we just moaned about training, said how much we wanted to quit but the thing was we still stuck, endured every training, every camp, every drop of sweat, every drop of blood, every injury. Dreading training but feeling guilty when we miss one, its so oxymoronic but true. Playing so many games of DOTA, Winning games against our junoirs at fun & games this camp despite being outnumbered, teamwork and trust. Heh, To me. We are always champions :D We will fight till the end... never give up :)
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Service tomorrow! After missing so many CGs plus last week's service, I really need this time to speak to Him once again... to make a lot of things right again, to repent, reflect and refresh... God, I Need You.

My life's been going around in circles. Not exactly comfortable. Suddenly, things aren't so clear anymore. Thing's that i had answers to suddenly just evade my thoughts totally. When i think back reflect on what i've done, i don't know if i did it right or wrong. I am a worrywart, so i think i worry then i solve. But this time, i just feel confused. Sometimes the line is so thin between right and wrong. Somethings just don't have what's right or wrong. How can you be yourself when others tell you to change? How do you be yourself when you find yourself becoming more and more isolated?

Time and Tide wait for no man.

As your life moves on a different course, other people's lives move on. Their connections grow stronger like a raft formed, while you drift like a piece of driftwood out at sea. No one waits because you can't catch up. New bonds cut away frayed ones without mercy. Sometimes no one thinks or cares about what you do. Sometimes they care too much that they read too much into it. Such are the ways of humans. When you find someone you can truly trust, hang on tightly and don't let go. Cherish and be loyal. Be open, frank and friendly to those around you, this way you can be someone else's Angel in Disguise.

Words are powerful things. Once given, never taken back. Do you know how many times you have hurt someone unconciously? I don't know how many times i have. But i must try to keep count and know that i must do something about it. It sounds to empty and hypocritical for it is an ideal. But striving for a goal and an ideal is the only way we can improve right? Ideas never die.... -V

Who knows what the future holds?

I wonder.
I hope,
I care.
And i really hope you will understand.

Thank you Lord for blessing me with everything and for giving me your love. Praise be to You, Lord.

Our Father In Heaven,
Hallowed be your name...
-Matthew 6:9