Sunday, April 30, 2006
Sunday, April 30th

Today was quite a simple day starting with me waking up late X.X at 10 sigh... probably because i reached home pretty late after fac outing yesterday.

I went for a swim at my cous's house alone it was pretty relaxing. There was this waterfall, a small one which was reallie nice to stand under :P coz you could feel the pressure on your neck. I dunno what came over me but i totally let go of everything right there and prayed. I reflected and just simply prayed and I feel so relieved of everything right now :D Spiritually energised ^^

I prayed to Him about so many things and it just makes me feel so much better knowing that He is with me all the time.

I trust with all my heart that things will only get better ^^ I'll post details later about fac outing and some other stuff. :D

Thursday, April 27, 2006
April 27th.

Firstly, A VERY BIG SORRY to Charm. Although i wanna laugh:P!!! Today was just so comical! I will remember your birthday i swear:P 10 yrs down the road you come and ask me again :P

Today's Post will be dedicated to a few people. Whether i know them or not is another matter.

First, it would be to the RJ girl plagued by cancer. When Levan from Ronin mentioned it, i sort of remembered my parents talking about it. And During our CT session, in all the music, i truly thought about life once again. I imagined myself with one month left to live. Now i know why they say dat humans can't live with death always on their minds. It was horrifying. Counting out the days when you KNOW you won't exist anymore... Knowing how your frenz will try to spend every waking moment with you but it would be awkward... because you never know when you might go. Your parents watching over you... maybe on the surface happily but their hearts heavy as lead. I nearly teared... haha i guess its sort of embarassing... but it was just sad. Oh Lord, I pray give her and all the people facing the same situation out there a miracle if you would... Let them live their days happily and memorably... May they live their life to the fullest...

I can't find any other words to put in because it cannot be put forth in words, but truly i hope and pray for them...

I would also like to dedicate this post to my caregrp mates!!!! Thank you for giving me such a fun caregrp session today :D:D. It was a really fun first caregrp session and Tracee and Jinqi planned the sermon reallie well, xiang yu was great with praise and Talen had a fun game :D:D It was just hiong fun:P LOL :)

Thirdly, to MJ :P for being crap partner now:P Coz while everyone is busy with their own stuff and i'm stuck in boredom and sad reflections, she still can make all those funny statements :P Haha she's just lame and comical :P

Fourthly, to Charm. Coz of the birthday thing. It was hilarious :P dun worry i swear i will remember and you will get your present :P

Finally to Jeriel! Hey buddy, dun feel too down abt the match k? Life's never a bed of roses, we just gotta work harder and come back stronger. Every failure is another step to success! Dun give up, don't stop, just keep going! Just learn from the experience and things can only get better. hang in there man!!!!

Yeap. CHORALE IS FINALLY GOING!!!! SYF is soon and i'm super excited. Hehe!

Lord, Please bless us all in these days and may your name be praised! Amen :D

Tuesday, April 25, 2006
24th April

I admit. I haven't been spending time with the family much or at all. Sometimes i think its me. Going out with them, doing things they like, i just dun feel right.... when i do, i realise that it'll end up with someone getting angry with me, or i'll just end up with myself thinking of my own thoughts. Am i wrong? Oh Lord, please help me....

He requires a feeling that he has a hold on me... I need to have enough discipline to make a soldier out of me. My duty is to study and nothing else. Everything i truly loved, truly had a passion for it, he didn't like me doing it. Since i was a kid till now. I know I'm not fully mature but i think i can think and judge and feel now. Maybe i have feelings and thoughts now all right?

I only felt 3 flashes of pain when he started shouting at me. He apologised afterwards for his anger. And he started lecturing me abt what i should do of course... i listened. He had been of course searching thru my chat logs and maybe this blog. Which is why a lock will be placed really soon. Of course, i don't feel anger at him. I feel more disappointed, more sorrow.... Just sad... We never really got along with him disciplining me throughout my childhood.

You don't understand me. To me, I'm still the kid plays games 24/7. The kid who goes out and plays but never studies. To you i haven't grown. The side of me you've never seen. You wish to see it but i can never show you because you never trust me. Thus i can't trust you. My heart barred. My thoughts locked. My spirit chained like a dog. But my will is always alive. Your apology will not be able to destroy the wall which separates me from you. The grudges that you held for me hurt me like never before. I haven't matured. But i am growing. Have you seen it yet? But yet, I would pray for you. For our family. I love you guys even though i would never be able to say it. But i will be quietly praying.

I am sorry to everyone , all my friends and family, for all the times i hurt you with my words or actions. I'm sorry if any of my actions and words were insensitive. I'm sorry. I will change and grow up through all these years. I hope that you guys will be with me through this journey of life.

This post is the reflection of my heart. Maybe its too serious. Maybe it exposes too much of myself within it. Maybe to anyone reading this, it is only an article of the thoughts of a boy who is on his journey. But to this boy, this post will forever be something for me to look back and to reflect upon. This is my heart.

Oh Lord, please bless everyone on this earth, to let them live happily. Please aid me on this journey of Life as well. Please be with me and thank you for everything you have given me. Thank you and praise you Lord. Amen.

Saturday, April 22, 2006
April 23rd

Let's see now. Recap on JTS: 06A13.

Fungg, Yvonne and me left LEAPS pretty early at abt 3 to go for service which we were awfully late for >.< but it was still fruitful nonetheless. Thank you Tracee and Fungg for gifting me with my Bible :D:D!! Yay! :D

Unfortunately, it didn't go so well with the rain coming down and GB was v late turning up with the food and the others :P the people who got there early were with the senoirs. And quite paiseh la, the senoirs outnumbered us and weren't very happy :P

But when the thing finally started, it was fun! Siqi was damn pro at starting the BBQ and the fire was up within minutes x.x Everyone was having which was darn cool. Some guys went up to watch the Soccer match. Fungg, Yvonne and Junhua with their marshmellow madness >.< I was on a fruit fiesta, Kar Weng and Lee Yang going nuts with their imaginary helicopter story, Hongwei and the rest playing cards. Lol, it was just a lot of things happening at the same time. Jian Yang ended up in the pool at the end of it all :P I guess i was just pretty exhausted throughout the entire thing so i just sat at a quiet balcony with LY, KW, YK and SJ. Of course the crowd got bigger and we just sat down and talked mmhmm :P

JTS was alright i guess ^^ Just dat we were missing a few people who were missed :P

Yeah, got home at arnd 11+-12 just exhausted.

Got up pretty early today. Today is just another Sunday which makes it boring. Pls someone spice it up :( x.x Good Luck for YL night to all the OAC-ers! Post later.

Thursday, April 20, 2006
April 20th.

YAY! I'll post again today. After various tests, there is one more hurdle. MATH! My weakest subj... sigh... i will practise hard. After this.

Peer tutoring was cool today! haha my grp was quite zai sia! Jaysee, Jia Huey, Seow Shi, Hui Zhen, a fun bunch x.x :D:D I pray that everything goes well for them and i will try my SO VERY BEST to help!!!!! Haha coming up with all sorts of plans, coz i'm worried for them :S Hope they'll do well :D But we laughed a lot today and the English department is so darn fun LOL! Laughter but not much constructive coz we did planning today of what we wanna do and achieve :D

I pray for everyone tmr for maths test! And OUR WEEKENDS GONNA ROCK!

Look forward to: JTS, PULSE! Another class outing YAY! :D JIAYOU TO EVERYONE!

Tuesday, April 18, 2006
April 18th, Tuesday.

This is a VERY LONG OVERDUE POST!

EASTER, Saturday on the 15th of April: I don't know how to put it. Should i say i have come back or should i say its a new journey...? But Thank the Lord for looking after me all these years... Every moment, everyday for the past 9 years, ever since i stopped believing... But all these years, praying... I was selfish. Counting on your blessings yet not believing. But I'm so happy I'm back into Your arms! Thank you Tracee and Fungg for inviting me and bringing me back! :D Praise be to the Lord :) ( Samuel for all the help :D and acceptance)

Falcks is back in full force! three tests, this week! Econs tmr!!!! ARHHHHH!
SMB= Students messaging board? x.x

Exhausted from training and supposed to be studying now, but still i felt i should make this short post! :D

HC caregrp ROX! Period.

I need to learn how to post photos x.x I'm such a noob. and my blog is sooooo wordy x.x!

PW Grp HI1014! :D haha our grp rox la! I'm quite happy with our grp composition and let's just do damn well! Hee work hard everyone and i hope we get the chance to bond too :P

I'm quite excited abt what's gonna happen:) And i feel much less burdened. Pray Lord may everyone be healthy, safe and happy! :D

End post! Tag plz!

Friday, April 14, 2006
Good Friday. April 14th

Good Friday. I wonder what makes it good hmmm :S

Woke up pretty late again x.x at abt 9:30 :( i was rather sleepy even tho i was awake-awake which is rather rare. Was supposed to meet my batchies for k box today at 11 so i rushed quite a bit :P In de end, only Hin,CQ and me went with the J1 gals, pheywa and charlene. The girls can reallie sing la! Sigh... me= no pitch, no scale= no melody mannn x.x!!! ARH I WISH i can sing! Some people are so lucky to be blessed with good voices oh wells. But K box was so fun x.x!!! and so much cheaper than the last time.

Going to tracee's church tmr. I wonder wat it'll be lyk. I think i will feel quite awkward leh haiz!! oh wells i shall just go there and relac :).

Once i was ordinary, until you came along,
And made it magical, yet mentally unsound.
You gave a feeling instead that was never known,
That reallie was in my heart, truly profound.

Things really didn't matter if you were in my mind,
although you weren't so very divine.
Yet you were special, normal,
And beautiful enough to take my soul.

To spend Life with that One special person,
would it be a dream or truly real?
Would that One person come,
Or would this wait be of no avail.

No One knows the answer. But i hope My heart will know.
Kismet.

Wednesday, April 12, 2006
April 12th, Wednesday.

I read all the tags of stagnant blogs and yes, i am guilty as charged.

The Parent's Day today was ultimately chaotic. Me and Jeriel had the easiest job (seemingly) at first being only assigned to carry this table to the middle of the stage after the presentation. But as usual, thru the entire thing, we had to usher guests, give out phamplets( with Lee Yang. poor thing), with parents swarming at you. Yes SWARMING. I just walk past and this forest of hands come up in front of me.... I was like "Ok, could you please wait?" but in my mind i was going nuts. Afterwhich, both of us had like 5 mins left to devour whatever leftovers we could manage. Becoz we had to carry the table. Super hectic. I'm so darnnn tired now!!!!

Yes, Lee Yang and Kar Weng. We will start "华文 Cool!". 我们将在每一个晚上射出五彩缤纷的成语鞭炮! 几颈爆！

Good Friday coming soon! haiz, but i dun have any outings planned. Seems like everyone's busy with their own planz. I hope saturday can join Hongwei, Shijia they all for K for like an hour before going to tracee's church! Shuld be quite exciting lol! My first Easter!!! O.O!

Sunday, i hope, will be my mugging day. Where Jonathan turns into a guai mugger hoping for company which will probably erm... not come. Who mugs on Sunday la?

WE GOT TESTS THIS AND NEXT WEEK! period.
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Today's CT session was so farnie! X.X The Gangsta Shijia and the Nerd Hongwei. I mean it was comical. ( Couldn't help laughing like a nutcase k? Anyway i almost always laff like a nutcase.) Guobin as a Afri*** LOL. Shum was like a damn zai ZZY and Kenneth was funny while not trying to be! Omg Weak wrist syndrome X.X
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I know you guys treat him better. But dat doesn't mean you can give in to him all the time. And I'm quite tired of it.
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Random thot: I miss fac dance x.x....

Thursday, April 06, 2006
April 7th :D

Its rare that i'm on at 1240 am nowadays :D and i'm still on :P

PI is reallie a killer piece of hw! Omy, i think summary took me half an hour not to mention the entire afternoon of brainstorming. Feeling so good after finishing it :D Mission accomplished.

This is one of the rare days where i felt ultimately tired for no reason. I was practically half asleep the entire day. I missed my stopped on the way home X.X too pid right?? then i had to take a bus back again. Ahhh felt like quite a fool X.X but i reallie dozed off completely.

Sighh... need some rest man :P tmr's gonna be a tough day. Hope for a class outing soon!

Tuesday, April 04, 2006
April 4th.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TRACY!

Yes, another birthday party today. Hoped you enjoyed yourself :D

PT is represented not by Physical training but Physical Torture. I dun even feel right now X.X I think it killed me so its not making me stronger :P

Another thing i was thinking abt yesterday:

10 ways a certain parent can ruin your day:

1. Scream at you for not putting a plastic bag back after coming home from work
( And follow up with half a dozen other sentence with absolutely no relevance to this)
2. Stare at you as if you did something wrong, while you know that you haven't even said a word or done a thing
3. Hint that you are distracting your sibling from homework while you haven't even done a thing.
4. Ask you why you don't do hwk in front of them (har?) and get pissed abt it
5. Compare you with some random person you don't even know
6. Come home from a project dead tired only to be screamed at for being late
7. Telling you not to play computer games while your obviously doing GP homework (reallie har? again)
8. Telling you to get off your comp while your rushing through a life-threatening project ( saying dat you are playing too much computer games)
9. not trusting your word while your telling the truth
10. Judging you based on what you have done in the past

Bleahhx. This may help to explain why i'm not close to my family perhaps. But i'm not complaining. Keeping to myself has its own merits! :D I can't wait for thursday and Sunday. I need to get my mugging session for Sunday going again.

PI coming up!!! I need to prep sia. Still no ideas. Getting killed. I don't like koping Mr Quek's ideas coz its Mr Quek's Ideas not mine but i may not have a choice. I wish i had some idea on what i'm gonna write abt! Please give me some ling2 gan3 soon.

I love music so much. What can i do for it??!!! AHHHHHH! I wanna learn a new instrument.

This.
Post.
Is.
So.
Random.

I wanna get my next Robin Hobb book soon! i wanna try to get my hands on a graphic novel from the Sandman series esp the one T-sqaure was talking abt today. I'm super into mythology.

I hope for a better day tmr!

Your shadow, wavers at the corner of my eyes.
Your voice, resounds in every dream i have.
Your touch, tingles thru me magically.
Your heart, beating to the rhythm i follow.
Your soul, touching mine like never before.
You, my angel, my soulmate,
Bringing heaven to my doorstep.

Sunday, April 02, 2006
Sunday!!!!! 2-4 X.X

Chee Yang won campus superstar! (Praying for half day now) But congrats! :D

Today was cool. went out to study with shijie and her fren for most of the day. I think she's quite sick, get some rest and get well soon. :D:D Did some constructive work with my Lit somehow X.X (yes mugging) Finished most of Scene one for Malfi and finished 20 qns for the guide. But my math.... is sad :P

Tmr is another monday. On Sundays, Thinking of tmr gives me the blues X.X

Is everyone stressed or something?? Coz these days things are rather stonish. I can feel the fatigue oso, losing the hyperness is quite unfun but i guess its natural with the workload coming hard. Looking forward to Thursday again! Solace for the week.

Saturday, April 01, 2006
April Fool's....

April fools on a saturday... wasn't much of an april fool's day to tell the truth.

Went off for training as per every saturday. Watched my final bout... and realised how many chances i missed. I wish i followed it thru. but what's past is past. What i can do is to train harder so it doesn't repeat itself. Came back for interesting extra training which lasted till 12-12:30.

Which is why i must apologise to Tracy for not being able to accept her invitation :( Thanks for inviting me but sorry i couldn't make it yupps.:X

Spent the afternoon with my teammates, LAN-ing which was moderately amusing (although not very constructive:P)

Interesting fact: my junoirs actually talk to the Bishan gay. Holy. We saw him at coro and we actually talked to him. I swear he's dangerous. All boys beware :P
( fungg another place where you can try to catch a glimpse of this elusive figure o.o to you la so far :P)

Will a lone soul touch the soul of another?
If it would, i wish mine would touch yours.
Savour it as it were mine,
And care for you forever.