Monday, July 30, 2007

It doesn't help falling sick when the ticking time bomb for A's is running out.

Not to mention ever ill-disciplined me, combined with the fact that your eyes are red and you look like the resident evil. The continuous watering of the eyes from the first eye infection of my life ( I dun even know why, i dun wear contacts x.x) makes me pray really hard i never get it again. With fever, waking up is a pain and sleeping is bliss.

But when i take a step back and look at these two days, other than feeling guilty from not touching my work nearly at all (except finishing hypo testing! :D), I think that i've spent it in a different and rather meaningful way.

I've finally had the time to lay back and think. What am i going to do with my life? How am i living this life in a meaningful way? Joyfully? Griping? Have i lived the life i was made to live? I think these questions lead me to turn to God a lot more, seeing past some illusions and delusions, maybe seeing places which i lack, seeing how my life can be lived differently. Passing the wheel on to a friend i can trust is much more meaningful than living it like anybody else :)

Did you know that Love is the promise of pain. You can't love without sacrifice, face it, stop living in your lil utopian imagination and wake up. Love may be an "oh-so-wonderful" idea but do you really see love for love?

We can't learn to love or learn to trust. Because learning to love or trust is simply to love or trust. You can't take steps, you've gotta leap right into it. I mean if you keep testing the water, you'll never learn how to swim, you've gotta just hop into it and live it. Live the dream.

The burden of studies hasn't stopped pushing, considering i'm pretty down on studies and i'm simply struggling, but that doesn't mean that i should just leave it. I've gotta keep my head down and start walking. Walking walking.

I've realised a new way to use the standby notes in my phone :) it just gives me a new smile everyday now :D

Wanna thank everyone who has given me a message or shown concern today :), just wanna say that every message brought a smile to my face and a spark in the difficulty of being awake. Thank you all so much esp Junhong, Jer and so many others. :)

Hope to see you guys soon!

I shall stop looking like a resident evil!